Today Sterling went on a trial run with a friend who would like to adopt him if everything works out. While I knew this was coming, it was still one of the hardest things I have ever done.
We went out to her car, he had this happy walk, but when we got to the car and I put his stuff inside...he did not want to get in. I was trying to remain happy and not let him see, because I did not want to make it any harder on him. Once he got in, I gave him one last hug, and then ran back inside where I could watch her drive away and cry in peace. He watched out the back window the whole time....
It is a great stituation for him, and really for me as well, as she lives locally and I will be able to see him frequently, not to mention watch him when she is out of town. But he is not my boy, my Sterling anymore, and man is that hard.
How do you do this over and over again? Does it ever get any easier, or do you always cry? I love raising, but sending them off is hard.
I guess it is true though, better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.
Sorry about the long and sad post. Have to get it out sometime!
Happy post with pictures from the Utah puppy raising workshop we had on Saturday to follow. And of course...my late pictures of Millicent!
9 comments:
Every good puppy raiser has these feelings Sarah. It means you're a great raiser! :) The trick is to not take a break between puppies, but to get the new one when the old one leaves. It doesn't make you feel better, but does distract you. Try to remember not to compare pups and you will be absolutely fine! Giving them up is tough, but that's not why we do it...
You will always cry, at least, I will! You care, and that's a good thing! Keep your chin up, I can't say the pain goes away, every time one of these dogs leaves us it leaves a small (or large) whole in your heart, but it does get easier with time.
I would agree with Lindsey. If having them go is really hard, that just means you loved them, which is your job as a puppy raiser :) Saying goodbye is always so hard, but somehow, we are able to do it. So congrats on raising Sterling. Can't wait to hear how the trial goes! And, as I have been able to see with Suede, it will get easier. I now don't see Suede as 'mine'. Though she will always be my girl, she isn't my dog anymore. She was always meant to be where she is right now.
In my experience, it is a LOT easier when your puppy leaves for formal training than when he/she gets CC'd in the home. That has been really tough for me (I've done it twice!). It is very hard when "our" babies leave, but that's just what happens, just a part of the crazy roller-coaster we call puppy raising.
Hi Sarah,
I think I have finally found the answer to that question.
You Forget and you get another pup.
Which I think is the only way you can go through this "madness" more than once.
((Hugs))
I can't imagine it gets any easier. Good luck - I hope his new home works out and you still get to see him.
It is always hard giving them up! Hopefully this home will work out though so you can still see him from time to time. I don't think it ever gets easier... every recall is hard for a different reason!
For me:
#1 was hard because she was my first
#2 was hard because she was my heart puppy
#3 was hard because I worked so hard on behavioral and medical issues and was very unsure of his future
#4 was hard because she saw me through a very hard year
#5 will be hard because for many months he was all I had...
And I'm sure the list will go on!
Oh ... I love you all and don't know how you do it, but thank you for your amazing example of love and service. Thinking of you Sarah!
I know this is late, but I can completely understand your pain. Arturo never came home after he was career changed, but I did see him once. Saying good bye was the hardest thing ever, especially since he didn't know who to go with. Time does help, but the pain never goes away. Especially with your first one. It's been almost 3 years for me, and I still cry when I think of him...
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